Hello Friends:

Blessed Aquarius Season.

The time I've been side-eyeing since I took on my internal gutting out in order to steward an idea with integrity.

I'm going to talk about two heroine stories, which describes this past week of the personal planets traveling through Pluto, the planet of death, rebirth, transformation, power, reckoning, and initiation.

Mars will be passing over Pluto this coming week to complete the story. Stay tuned.

First, let's look at the sky as it was. As above, so below.

As within, so without.

I normally write about the transits to come, but I want to explore what just happened that will inform our moving forward.

Between January 17th and 23rd, Venus, the Sun, Mercury, and Mars successively entered Aquarius, each forming precise conjunctions with Pluto that felt (and will feel) increasingly unsettling.

The intensity peaked around January 18th-19th when the Moon, Venus, and Pluto formed a triple conjunction, where Venus met Pluto exactly on the 19th at 3°19' Aquarius exposing love and power that asked: What must die for deeper connection to be born? And what is my worth and how is it showing up in relationships and projects? Where am I abandoning myself to take care of others?

Mercury joined Pluto on the 22nd, bringing language to what had been un-say-able. The Sun followed on the 23rd, illuminating the underworld, our shadows. And yesterday, Mars, the planet of will and action, crossed into Aquarius, moving toward its own conjunction with Pluto on February 2nd, demanding we act from this transformed place.

I've been building Equanimity Commons through this transit, and the parallels to ancient stories of feminine initiation have become impossible to ignore. Like Mary receiving the angel's message ("be it unto me according to thy word") there's a moment in every creative undertaking when you must accept a fate you didn't choose but somehow always knew was yours. And like Persephone, dragged into Hades' (Pluto's) realm, there's the descent: the brutal confronting of your comfortable "surface world," the forced encounter with what lies beneath, the dark education that transforms maiden into queen. This Aquarian stellium has been both annunciation and abduction. It summoned me to sovereignty first as disruption, asking me to rule over landscapes I never wanted to visit, much less govern.

The Queen of Cups

She has been appearing quite often in my daily Tarot pulls that invite me to go deeper into my feeling feminine spaces, which confounds this stoic Capricorn. With Venus and the Moon conjoining Pluto, I confronted my deepest fears around love and intimacy. My favorite thing to say to people when they say they love me, is in fact, "No. You love YOU loving me." Meaning they are relishing who they are when they're with me. They love the glorious bits inside themselves that I might be bringing out.

And yet, when I tell Gabe that I love him, I don't necessarily love the me saying it, holding the feelings that I could be a better mother and all the ways I might have failed him. And yet, I care deeply for him. I love him.

So maybe it can be both. Projecting love and attraction within you towards another person while also feeling genuine care for their wellbeing and success separate from you.

Let's read the cards above.

The Seven of Wands always trying to stay one step ahead. I realize that I tended to want to be the savior or the better, wiser person in a dynamic. I'm going to chalk it up to my triple Capricorn, Moon in fixed Taurus, and my perfectionist Virgo stellium and a childhood that required me to be the parent. If I know more and can save or fix you, then I could prove my worth. Mercury's cazimi in Aquarius showed me that I took on people as projects towards my own enlightenment. And as I become aware of this, I am reminded of the saying, "The universe will test you." Well, the universe doesn't care about your bullshit. It's more that now you are aware of something, whereas you've been swimming in it, you will no longer be able to ignore it. And it feels like something is testing you, but it's only your raw, spanking-new awareness constantly confronting you.

The World shows all the work that has already been done, the completion of the hero's journey (in my case the eco-heroine's quest). The naked woman shows that although there's an accumulation of experiences, status, and wisdom, it's best to be exposed and vulnerable, knowing that you don't know everything, and to stay open to more Truth. The Sun joining Pluto, success by integrating your shadows.

The Ace of Cups speaks to a gift of new feelings, abundance overflowing, love emerging. Venus conjoining Pluto to transform old beliefs about the power of love and not needing to earn it.

The High Priestess is the mystery and the spiritual exploration that unlocks everything. Unlike the Moon (conjoining Pluto), which hints at uncertainty and not knowing what's real, the High Priestess inuits and connects deeply to what is important but we can't necessarily see or touch.

All these cards reversed show that perhaps their potency is weakened by a force or energy.

Strength. Courage. The muscling through of old patterns and behaviors in order to get things done. This is how I get my way. This is the force required to manifest ideas into things into this world. But when Mars is in Aquarius, action is strategic. And when he conjoins Pluto it is the courage to integrate your processed traumas and shadows into your actions.

The Queen of Cups is the emotional maturity, abundance, loving presence that attracts and bestows blessings from a full and overflowing state. It is accepting people as they are, not wanting to change anyone, not even oneself. But to hear the call and make the choice to love all parts of yourself into being.

When Mary received the message from the Archangel Gabriel that she was to birth the savior of the world, I imagine there was wonder and terror at the same time. The idea came to her and she was given the choice to accept to steward it or not. She surrendered to the power of the imperative, offering herself as a vessel to the collective, divine ask. Not knowing that what she would bring into the world would be so profound and prolific, but also judged and condemned, and ultimately sacrificed for the greater good.

I think about this when an idea whose time has come visits one of us. We choose to take it on or let it go to someone else. When we choose to bring it to life, we don't know how it will be received, its impact, or its required sacrifices of us (maybe we do and do it anyway), but there is something in us that feels called. Often it happens during cosmic timing. In our birth charts. We can feel when we are riding the big wave or fighting to make our own needs and conditioned, cultural wants a reality.

We can look to the Persephone myth for how to make it through this calling. Innocently picking flowers thinking we are safe, we are dragged by circumstances into our underworld and forced to grow up in the darkness of the hard parts of our life. We come to love Pluto because we begin to love, accept, and integrate the darkest parts of ourselves. As we come to the surface of our incarnated reality, we have dirt under our nails and a crown that we're beginning to get used to wearing. And we don't mind going back under when we need to, coming back up more refined and resilient.

Queendome. Not kingdom or queendom, but the dome of boundaried spaciousness that our integration has gifted us. We have awareness, tools, support, and love so readily available when we are ready to receive them.

Project Updates

Ok, phew! You don't want to be in my brain. That breakthrough above happened just this week and knocked me down for several days trying to regulate my nervous system. The outcome was relief. Relief to finally see and understand, to admit the brutal truths of my patterns and behaviors that I will not be taking with me into Equanimity Commons.

I wonder how this past week has changed you. Has it changed you?

Since November 30th with the New Moon in Scorpio of doing the deep inner work for 30 days, and the Mercury Cazimi in Scorpio of researching this idea for 117 days that won't let me go, things have taken on a life of its own.

I had warned that the first part of January was the time to commit to your vision with all your heart and efforts because the wind was at your back. February and March are tricky with the outer planets moving signs, the next eclipse season, and an intense Mercury retrograde.

Serendipity abounded when I happened into Michi Ramen while in my old neighborhood for an appointment. It was under construction and their market was no longer operational because HMart was too big a competitor. They happened to be selling their refrigeration, which is something I had been worried about, after taking my 3-day Argus Farm Stop course. The expense was unknown. Now it's known and available.

Then, while driving through Hill Country looking at land and properties, I headed back to Mercer St. to take a look at a defunct gasoline station, which keeps calling to me. I believe it's owned by The Salt Lick and because of the hard permitting and water issues of Dripping Springs, they have not been able to open a restaurant there. I walked the street looking at upcoming spaces for lease and noticed my favorite store The Juniper Tree Market was open on a Sunday. They were winding down their business, having sold the building, and everything was 25% off.

I asked if they were selling the displays and furniture and they were! But the store was closed and I was asked to come back the next Friday when things would be 35% off. That Friday I bought the entire store: cashier's desk, shelves, furniture, desks, racks, and more. I have so many crates!! The owner Vicky threw in even more items to help me start my farm stop. They are now in storage waiting for our location.

Then I visited the Texas Department of Agriculture to talk about my idea, how it differs from farmers markets, which require a long set of permits, and what programs I might qualify for. They were excited about my idea and asked for my slide deck to pass on to their boss, who was in Tennessee. Instead I recorded a quick presentation that I have been giving farmers to gauge their interest and hear their feedback and concerns. It's a 10-minute watch, if you'd like to see it here.

Lastly, Art and I have been visiting farms and farmers, talking to producers at farmers markets and understanding why current systems and infrastructures may not be working for them. We have 100% interest from the producers and farmers we have spoken to in signing up when we are ready to open our doors, which is encouraging. We visited Sovereignty Ranch in Bandera where Mollie Engelhart spoke plainly about the reality of farms and ranches in this climate and political environment.

Although she has built a beautiful $3M property with a restaurant, store, cabins, a cattle ranch with goats, sheep, an ostrich and more, she is finding it difficult to pay off her loans and investment expectations. It's really hard for farmers across the board. She is also finding ways to be resourceful by creating value-added products like skincare, spices, and sourdough bread to bring in more revenue. The restaurant features things grown on the farm and their raw milk is so delicious.

Art and I continue to grow and deepen as a team, stress-testing our values and agreements. We have the hard conversations early and often, we meet regularly and use Asana, Mural, Notion, Workspaces, and all the platforms and systems to set us up for success at a foundational level. We reiterate: "We don't rise to the level of our goals, we fall to the level of our systems." We are driven and motivate each other to be our best selves for one another...but mostly for ourselves. I appreciate his strong and steadfast emotional regulation and reality checks, while he excels in learning all the business and cosmic timing stuff from me.

What's Next?

This is a different kind of newsletter. I've let you in on my process for building this idea, which continues to terrify and astound me. In the process of building it, I love who I'm becoming and revealing everything so that you can do your thing unapologetically.

There are no glaring transits coming up until February when Saturn enters Aries 😬🙄. You'll be asked to make it real. Whether it's a mindset, healing, project, or promise.

I live my life by the sky and stars, the plants and planet, which gives me comfort when the world feels like it's in chaos. But we were built for these times. We are here to contribute our talents and love. Please don't distract yourself because it feels overwhelming. And at the same time, don't beat yourself up because you aren't doing what you said you would or wanted to. I know that paralyzing feeling well. Hello Mars in Pisces.

I live daily with thoughts that this might not work, what if I get bored of it, what if I don't follow through, what if I lose all my money and efforts...What if...it fulfills me...and serves the greater good...and preserves the land...and nourishes people in all the ways I hope it will.

Simply stay present. Love who you are, where you're at. If you have capacity, love someone or something else, too. Trust that while you don't know what the outcome will be, the present is all you have. And if you care for this moment just right, the rest will take care of itself.

Plan With Your Profection in Mind

Annual profections is a Hellenistic Astrology technique that tracks a person's life by advancing one house per year, starting from the 1st house at birth, then the 2nd at age 1, and so on. Each year, the house indicated becomes the "profected house," and its ruling planet becomes the "Time Lord," highlighting specific life themes, events, and focus areas for that year.

Go to Astroseek or Astro to enter in your birth data and choose Annual Profections.

For example, if you are a Capricorn rising, and you are 34, you will be experiencing deep Scorpio themes ruled by Mars, particularly around your 11th house of networks, groups, associations, organizations, and friends. Mars is your Time Lord, so Mars transits will feel particularly activated throughout the year. This Mars conjoining Pluto in Aquarius on February 2nd might be one to watch. Remember that Mars and Pluto in Aquarius is less about taking brash action, but being strategic (Scorpio) and going deep.

The eleventh house represents community, long-term hopes, wishes, and aspirations. Often called the "House of Gains," it indicates how one contributes to society and finds support through networking.

​Book a session if you'd like some cosmic guidance or strategy. I know some of you out there are using AI to figure things out, which also works. But there's something about human witnessing and love that doesn't come from a formula that is weaving your words into something validating and comforting, and even revelatory. There's no risk in being vulnerable to your algorithm. I find the AI I've built so very helpful, but I love and prefer the wisdom I receive from my mentors, advisors, coaches, and friends.

Thank you for being part of my world and for your support of my work.

If there's anything you'd like me to write about, let me know. I'd love to know how you are.

With so much love and admiration,

Monica